Branded Panipoori: Next big thing!

I am throwing away a million dollar business idea for free. You’re free to pick it up and implement, provided you pay me 25% loyalty fee.

Almost everything we used to buy loose from a grocery store nearby now comes in branded packets. I find that the Poories used in ‘Panipoori’ (or gol gappas) hasn’t been branded yet. So here’s my idea to set up and grow this branded pani puri business.

Step 1: The product: Needless to say the branded panipuri will be attractively packed. While you can get a puri for 50 paise each, the branded Pani puri will of course be priced 20 times higher, to factor for heavy marketing expenses and profit margins. A neat well packed unit of 5 puris will be priced at just Rs 50, with lots of air in the pack to make it feel heavier. Of course there will be larger family packs, having 20 puris for just Rs 125…

Step 2: Creating the market: With a hefty budget and generous funding to some NGOs, a campaign can be run that puris used by roadside vendors are unsafe and can result in 2 dozen diseases of different severity. Well planted new stories, some stray incidents and ‘awareness campaign’s will inform consumers that branded puri is the solution to all pani puri related problems. We’ll hire some food bloggers to say “We will buy pani puri in only those shops that use branded Puris”

Now the fear is planted and market for branded Puris created

Step 3: Growing business: Flavored pooris. How long can you keep selling plain puri? Consumers will get bored, your marketing team will run out of ideas. So next big thing will be to introduce flavored puri.. Chocolate pani puri, lemon flavored pani puri, rose flavored Pani puri etc.. Flavored might be created with artificial chemicals but who cares?

Step 4: Expanding the market: How can everyone eat same pani puri? Consumers are different, so pani puris should also be different. We’ll launch “Children Pani puri or Junior Pani Poori!” which special ingredient that can make a kid grow faster, taller and become more intelligent than Einstein. So now parents will be more than happy to buy special ‘Junior Pani Poori’ for their kids by standing in line for few days in a supermarket, paying 30% premium over regular pani puris.

Next is to target women. How can women eat same panipuri that is traditionally consumed by men? Their needs are special, hence their puri should also be special… ‘Women Panipuri’ will soon rock the market. Moreover, Women Panipuri comes in different colours, so that everyone can eat puri of same colour as their dress. Cool no?

And then there’re health conscious people. ‘Herbal Panipuri’ and ‘Green Pani Puri’ is made exclusively for such people.

Step 5: Brand ambassador: We’ll enroll few top cricketers to say that they have been having our ‘branded puri’ ever since their childhood (doesn’t matter our brand didn’t exist then) and branded puri is the secret of their energy err success. A miss India can be hired to say branded Puri is the secret of her beautiful skin and face.

Step 6: ‘Before poories’ and ‘After poories’ and.. Just using shampoo is not enough. You should use half a dozen beauty products before applying shampoo and another half a dozen products after the bath. Same way, we will introduce ‘before Puri’ that should be eaten before consuming pani pooris. This will increase apititie, prepare your stomach and body for pani pooris. Then there’s after poori that needs to be consumed after eating pani puri, which will provide even more benefits…

Step 7: Takeaway Pani Pooris and instant pani pooris: Who has time to prepare the pani poori or wait in line for the vendor to prepare and serve? Take our takeaway kit or instant pani pooris which save time.

Step 8: Pani puri vending machines and kiosks: TO quickly dispense pani pooris in places like airports, cinema halls etc.

Step 9: Killing the competition: By giving deep discount (on already super inflated price), we will gain an impression that we are running charity. Then all local pani puri makers will go out of business, after which we will recover our loss many folds.

Step 10: Pani puri with potassium: We’ll hire some TV achor to pickup some random element from periodic table, question random people in moving trains if their panipuri has this random element. “Is there potassium in your pani puri”… Once they give confused look, explain to waiting camera how important that randomly chosen element is and that our branded pani puri has that element in abundance, so everyone should buy only our branded panipuri. (I hope the anchor doesn't pick up Uranium or Helium or Belgium..err.. I don't think any one will notice!)

Step 11: PPD: Similar to Café Coffee Day, we will launch a chain of stores called PPD or Pani Puri Day, where consumers can relax on super comfortable sofas and enjoy pani puri at Rs 250 a plate, in various flavors and combo offers…

Bolo branded pani puri ki Jai…

Similar: Branded tender coconuts & Toddy palm